Hello Family,
I’m posting the things I’ve been able to gather from Murr’s funeral service. I’m also going to include a message I sent to him before he died. I invite any who would like to, to share memories and experiences with Murr, either as comments or separate posts. Next, I’m planning to post some pictures and other things about Sonya B.Young and Maggie J Brown to fulfill requests from Connie and Sean. It is great to see the interest and participation on the blog so far. I hope everyone will enjoy using this to keep us connected. Love, Earlene
(back and front of funeral service folder)
(inside of funeral service folder)
Life Sketch for Funeral of Murr Lavar Brown, by Robert L. Brown, brother
We are here to celebrate the very special life of the youngest of my five brothers. And although he was a dozen years my junior, he was, in more than one way, a “Big Brother” to me.
Murr Lavar Brown was born at home in Pomerene Arizona on May 3, 1942. We knew right away that we had a live-wire on our hands when he turned over on his Aunt Melza’s lap, just minutes after his birth, before she was able to get him cleaned up and diapered.
He was dubbed in his early childhood by a member of he bishopric as “a vine full of vinegar.”
Some of you are old enough to remember that in the forties we started to see 8 cylinder car engines, and you will recall that one of the most popular ones was the Mercury V-8. Well, Murr’s name combined with his energy levels made it inevitable that his older brothers soon morphed his moniker from Murr to Murrcury. And this even before he turned 8!
While his general exuberance may have resulted in occasional mischief in his younger days, more importantly, it propelled him to a lot of athletic acclaim while in high school; and, along with a very creative intellect, to an unusually productive professional life later on. Like our oldest brother, Marvin, it never occurred to him that there was anything he couldn’t do, that he really wanted to try. He never saw a job that he couldn’t do.
Before graduating from high school, in addition to his athletic and academic achievements, he had proven himself as a versatile farm hand, a skilled sack sewer in the potato packing shed, and a skilled “skinner” of a D-6 Caterpillar tractor.
Among the jobs he performed while working his way through BYU were janitor; milker at the Y Dairy, creamery hand, and Rena Ware salesman.
After graduation he taught high school and, almost single-handedly, built a summer vacation home for one of his fellow teachers. He left this profession to manage the lumber mill owned by Cheryl’s father and left that to become a developer of time-share condominiums.
Along the way he took his turn as a fork life operator, welder, and brick mason. He earned an engineering degree and for a time worked in the aerospace industry for Thiokol. He also taught seminary and, for a number of years, moonlighted as an income tax preparer.
I will leave it for Barry to tell of his work in the roofing industry in California.
So many job changes on a single resume might suggest that that person couldn’t hold a job. But I assure you that every move that Murr made in his working career was made on his terms.
I’m not aware of all the church jobs Murr was called to. I was not only in a different state most of the time, but usually on a different continent. I do know that his service in the church included a full-time mission in Argentina. I know that, while in California, Murr and Cheryl worked as stake missionaries and he also served as Mission President of his stake mission. I believe the church calling he enjoyed most was heading up a prisoner rehabilitation program. The positive experiences he had in this program were so powerful that he was motivated to sell his roofing business and go back to school the receive a Masters Degree in psychology and become certified in family counseling and group therapy. One of several positions he held in this new capacity was chief psychologist in a Family Life Center where he and Cheryl worked in the rehabilitation of youth who had been in detention programs and were being prepared to fit back into normal society.
But, even this did not end the changing path of his careers. While working in the church’s family counseling program, he was not given a case load sufficient to fully occupy his time, or support his family, so, almost overnight he qualified himself as a counselor in the financial planning and mortgage business.
Throughout most of his adult years, a good deal of Murr’s creative energy has gone into writing. He leaves behind a significant body of excellent poetry, and one of his novels is presently in the hands of a publisher. His writings include a series of children’s’ stories, numerous essays, and a sizeable collection of original aphorisms which he has labeled “Reflections From The Rooftop.”
As suggested above, I missed out on a lot of Murr’s life, having married and left home when he was only 10. From that time until just a few months ago, we have lived quite far apart, as I was in the US Foreign Service for most of his adult life.
But, because quite a few other family members have displayed talents in writing, a few years ago, Murr goaded me into being the editor of a quarterly family literary newsletter, to which he was a major contributor. Because of this endeavor, I do have quite a few of his shorter writings on hand. I would like to share a couple of his poems and some of his rooftop philosophies.
Here are some of the latter that I have thought are quite powerful:
On the important subject of self-esteem he had this to say:
“If self esteem came easy it wouldn’t be worth much. But it doesn’t, so it is.”
On the Human Spirit: “It is more damaging to the human spirit to think of oneself as a victim than it is to be one.”
“It is more damaging to the human spirit to get away with a crime than to be punished for a crime that one did not commit.”
“It is more damaging to the human spirit to accept praise that was not earned than to be denied praise that was.”
“It is more damaging to the human spirit to be coddled than to be oppressed. This is true of individuals, families, societies, ethnic groups, and nations.”
On Growing old: “One reason growing old is frightening is because we’ve never done it before.”
“Growing old is like raising kids. By the time you figure out how to do it, your done.”
On Death: “Death, like birth, is just another milestone on the path to eternal life. It does, however, stand at a junction. The road we take away from the junction will depend largely on what we’ve learned between these two milestones.”
The following little poem by Murr has long been one of my favorites. I keep it in a collection of poems entitled: POEMS I WISH I HAD WRITTEN. It is called:
Keeping Up With The Joneses
When the Joneses got color TV, so did we.
When they put in cable, we weren’t able;
but we did.
When they got a BMW;
Don’t let it trouble you; so did we.
The Tudor in the ‘burbs,’
with the circular curbs;
the mountainous debt.
Who could forget?
I’m as good a provider as he, I cried!
We’ve worked so hard, we deserve it.
We lied.
Once we thought we’d outdone ‘em;
our bankruptcy surely would stun ‘em.
But, again, we were only the chorus.
They’d filed two months before us!
There is also a great lesson in this longer poem called I WROTE A BOOK:
I WROTE A BOOK
I wrote a book that no one cared to read.
I wrote a poem, but no one gave it heed.
I wrote a song, a story, and a theme.
I used up pencil, pen, and paper by the ream
I cry: “Why do I write when no one seems to care?”“
My pen’s on fire! I have so much to teach.
I reach out, but no one’s there to reach.
Each person’s life is filled up to the brim
with busyness and fluff and passing whim.
Things of substance seem to take a 2nd chair
to vain ‘necessities’ that lead only to despair.
And so, we grovel over things that need not be,
and pass by things designed to set us free.
And, since each mind’s so cluttered with debris,
the things I write, few others ever see.
And so, I write and set it on my shelf.
As it turns out, I’m writing for myself.
And then I note: “This isn’t really strange,
‘cause I’m the only one I really need to change!
From these writings, I think you can see that, (as the scriptures urge) with all his getting, Murr got a lot of understanding. More important than his considerable intelligence and talent, is what we call wisdom. Murr’s has been wise to the ways of men and has understood that the wisdom of man is foolishness to God.
Cheryl tells me that Murr’s favorite scripture is chapter 13 of I Corinthians. For most of us, that might be the scariest of all scriptures. You know, that’s the chapter where we are taught more than most of us want to know about the gospel principle of charity. That’s where we are taught that we can speak with tongues and prophesy; that we can understand the mysteries and have all knowledge, that we can have faith sufficient to remove mountains; but if we have not charity, we are NOTHING! It that doesn’t frighten you, you are a better Christian than I am.
Cheryl needn’t have told me that was their favorite scripture. I could have guessed. Because the lives of Murr and Cheryl reflect an understanding of that scripture more fully than the lives of any other couple that I personally know. In their married life, they have taken into their home stray and abandoned children more readily than most of us would adopt a stray puppy or kitten. I don’t know exactly how many surrogate children they have taken in, but I personally know of six that they have quite literally rescued from impossible circumstances and nurtured and healed. We have seen most of them go on, not only to productive lives, but also to fill missions for the church and be sealed in temple marriage.
One of them, whom I have personally met, as a teenager, found all his clothing and belongings thrown out on the front lawn of his home because he had chosen to be baptized into the church. Murr and Cheryl took him into their home, helped him develop his considerable musical talents, and sent him on a mission to Italy, where he had unusual opportunities to use his singing voice. When he returned, he helped them in the operation of the fine arts conservatory that Murr and Cheryl had founded in California.
I was struck by the aptness of the hymn we sang in the Cultural Hall just before coming into the chapel, and it occurs to me that seeds sown by Murr will be bearing fruit through the eternities.
It was not Murr’s choice to die at the early age of 68. But once it became evident to him that he was appointed unto death, he accepted it just as he had accepted all the other callings that came from the Lord during his fruitful life. His positive attitude has been an inspiration to all of us around him. I think we all hope that we might come to the end of our lives with the dignity that he has displayed.
And, It is my prayer that our lives may reflect the virtue and power of Christ’s Gospel as they have been illuminated by the life of my baby brother, Murr LaVar Brown. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen
(The following e-mail message represents the spirit and most of the content of Mike’s talk at Murr’s funeral. He didn't have his talk written out, as such.)
Hi Murr,
It's with a heavy heart and yet grateful heart that I attempt to write this email. I am not as gifted as you Browns at writing but I will attempt to express just a few of the feelings of my "Heart".
When your family moved into our neighborhood in Wellton, my life changed. You and Sandy saved me because I was headed down the wrong road! You guys lead me to the road leading to Eternal Life. Your friendship was saving influence in my life, not to mention to your "Missionary letter from Argentina" which led to my membership in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints! My life was changed for ever and I am forever indebted to you for that tremendous blessing in my life and my extended family!
One experience with you has endeared me to you forever! Once when " the Quiet Three plus One" were together at the Stage Coach having a soda, some guys drove up and called you outside and invited you to dump us and go with them to look for some girls! You came back in and said that you told them that you would rather stay with your friends. There are not words in my vocabulary to express how good you made me feel and how you taught me the importance of friendship.
You still to this day continue to teach me!!! All my life, I have looked up to you and respected your wisdom and steadfastness in following the Lord. I will always treasure the memories of you and the experiences that we had together. I am grateful that I can call you my "Friend".
All my Prayer and Love, Mike Huston
MURR AND THE PLAN OF SALVATION
Given by Barry E. Brown at the funeral service of his brother, Murr L. Brown
March 11, 2011
Where did Murr come from?
Moses 2:27 And I, God, created man in mine own image, in the image of my only Begotten created I him; male and female created I them.” He blessed them and God said unto them to be fruitful and multiply, and replenish the earth.
Moses 3:5 “And every plant of the field before it was in the earth, and every herb of the field before it grew. For I, the Lord God, created all things, of which I have spoken, spiritually, before they were naturally upon the earth.”
In the discourses of Brigham Young he explains that the spirit of man is organized of elements designed to endure to all eternity. It is brought together, organized and capacitated to receive knowledge and intelligence, to be enthroned in glory.
God, having organized us, knows every detail of who we are. He organized us with separate personalities, gave each special gifts, talents and capacity.
As spirit children we were called to the great council where we were presented with two plans. One by Lucifer, The Son of the Morning: He proposed that he force all mankind to be saved and he would claim all of the glory. The other by the Only Begotten Son: He promised freedom to choose, He would die for mans’ sins, and man could earn exaltation and eternal life by following Him.
We listened to both plans. Lucifer and one third of the hosts of heaven were cast out of heaven without a possibility of salvation. Though they are our brothers and sisters their lot is to tempt and try the souls of men.
Why was he here?
I testify with full clarity that there is a Lucifer. I have felt of his darkness. To my discredit there are times that I have listened to and bought into his lie that it will not hurt to try this just once. By doing so, each time, I know that I limited my access to the promptings of the spirit and opened the door for Satan to have even more power to tempt me in other ways. I know that he will use any lie to make evil look right and anything right to look evil. Please make no mistake he is real. His goal is 180 degrees from the Savior’s goal, to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man. Satan’s goal is to rob you of your chance for exaltation, in the presence of our Eternal Father.
The very fact that you and I are here today tells us that we accepted the Savior’s plan. Knowing the goal, I’m sure we were anxious to have our opportunity to come to earth and prove ourselves.
In a talk Murr gave at the funeral of our sister in law, Nadine Pew Brown, he expressed it this way: “When I visualize this experience, I think of my days as a football player and I see each of us on the sidelines saying, ‘Come on, coach, put me in, I can do it, let me prove it.’”
Well, the coach put Murr in. Perhaps Murr summed up his own gifts and qualifications best in the introduction of a character in a novel that he wrote called The Edan Antidote: “The constant physical activity of his job had kept his wiry muscles taut and lean. He also had a keen, inquiring mind, and he had been blessed or cursed, depending on how you looked at it, with a high degree of curiosity. In fact his extraordinary sense of curiosity frequently put him into situations from which his keen mind was barely able to extract him.
It has been an inspiration to see how Murr has harnessed his bundle of intellectual energy, curiosity, adventure and experimentation, to be a servant of his Father in Heaven and mankind, and the man whose life we honor today.
It is an honor and a great blessing to be Murr’s brother. I thank God that I have had the privilege to know Murr for what, and who, he truly is.
Murr has been an inspiration and blessing to many people in his lifetime. His parents, siblings, his family, roommates, missionary companions, mission presidents, investigators, fellow workers, employers, inmates, those he filled church assignments with, and young men and women that have found themselves in need of love and the security of a home away from home, to find themselves and reset the direction of their lives.
We cannot forget the unnumbered youth that have come to be inspired by Cheryl during piano and voice lessons.
There are some who will remember the I.R.T. days of California. I was excited when Murr came to Davis, California to be a sales rep for my branch of the franchise. He soon set new records in sales. He raise the bar and inspired salesmen in other branches of the franchise.
While Murr attended B.Y. U. he and a group of his close friends came to our home often. Sometimes we would be awakened in the night by a knock at the door. It would be Murr and company ready to play games and sometimes a night snack. At one time Murr found it funny to have been served a cotton pancake. When he brought a new friend to a meal he would ask to have his friend served a cotton pancake. His request was always granted, only to find that each time, his own pancake was also doctored with cotton. Those are times that will always be remembered and cherished.
Thank you, Murr, Cheryl and family. You have shown us how to endure to the end. We are all inspired by your courage under fire.
Where did he go?
At times like this, one may ask the question, “Why was Murr taken home after he had priesthood blessings? The blessings were given in faith by worthy priesthood holders.
In the May 2010 Ensign, Elder Dallin H. Oaks speaks about healing the sick. He instructs that we need not wait to see if medicine will cure a problem. When inspired and asked to anoint, it should be done. However, he instructs us that we have a responsibility to do all we can in conjunction with the anointing.
We are promised that a blessing that is given in faith and by the authority the priesthood will be acknowledged and that healing will take place unless the party is appointed unto death
We do not know the reason Murr was appointed unto death. I do not question our Father’s reason. However, I feel that it is for a worthy cause. I believe Murr has filled a worthy and complete mission.
In my mind’s eye, I can see Murr walking into the open arms of his Savior to report his life and his stewardship. In my mind’s eye, I can see Murr receiving a new mission call to teach those spirits in prison, who have been waiting to learn the truth that will set them free.
We know that the Savior bridged the gap between paradise and prison during the 3 days His body lay in the tomb, before His resurrection.
In closing I would like to testify that the plan of salvation is very real, that the plan was explained to us, in detail. We accepted it. We entered into a covenant that we would live by it for our own salvation and add to the glory of our God and His Son, Jesus Christ.
I am reminded that my deciding that it is okay to break His laws will not change the law in my favor. As our brother, Wilburn has said, “We will be judged by our every thought and action. We must endure until the end and that means until you re safely dead.”
We have the example of our ancestors who embraced the gospel early on. They passed their faith and testimonies on to our parents and they have given us adequate example and encouragement to know how we should live to find the happiness and peace that comes from living our Father’s law.
I cannot close without thanking our Father in Heaven fro the spouses that have come to bless the lives of my siblings.
God and The Savior live and they have prepared a way for our eternal happiness. May we so live, in the name of our Savior, Jesus Christ, Amen.
AS YOU LEAVE
As you leave now
Promise to visit someday
Watch your family
As it grows stronger day by day
As you leave now
Promise to wait for me
‘Til I join you
And we will be forever free
As you leave now
Promise to come back to me
To comfort me
For the days ahead scare me
As you leave now
Promise to give my love
To my family
And all my friends above
As you leave now
Promise to share your love
And your kindness
To everyone above
For I love you
And I will never forget
All the good times
And all the love you have shown unto me
-Talayna Ropp (granddaughter)
Dear Murr,
I’ve appreciated the updates you’ve sent in the past month or so. Thank you for sharing your perspectives and insights. It is good to be reminded to focus on what life really is all about and what really matters. It is easy to get distracted by trivia. I was touched by your New Year’s message and by Bob’s and Mike’s responses.
It’s been fun to think about some “Murr” memories. The moves to Georgia and Florida were pretty scary for me but provided experiences that I really needed and those years in the South were some of the most enjoyable of my teen years, as I look back. I don’t suppose I’ve ever thanked you for being there and for easing the transition for me as we participated in mutual activities, road shows, youth conference, dances, etc. Thanks for your efforts in helping me become a little less awkward socially and for letting me tag along on some of your adventures. Thanks for taking me to a movie and for taking me out of it when it became apparent it wasn’t going to be an appropriate experience. Thanks for fun little things like the dish juggling act, the honey tree and the post- hurricane ride out to the citrus groves on the tractor. Thanks for being a great big brother and for taking me under your wing during a time that would have been pretty lonely otherwise.
Thanks for being a part of the family tradition of perseverance that I feel is a big part of my heritage. It strengthens me against temptations to let things slide, take the convenient ways out, or to think that it’s no use because I’m never going to be strong enough to be who I need to be and accomplish what Heavenly Father needs me to do. I admire you and Cheryl for always working hard to make things work and make things better and especially to make peoples’ lives better. Thanks for figuring out what is real and for acting on that. You are a good example for me.
Best wishes for finishing your book. I hope to see you again soon- maybe at the time of Bob’s birthday party.
Love and prayers,
Earlene
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